i saw another guy with a beautiful mohawk yesterday at Great America. actually, i saw seven people with mohawks yesterday, but one guy in particular stood out.
the horrible thing is that i really wanted to talk to him, and we'd have plenty to talk about i'm sure, but i lack the confidence to go up to people and initiate conversation.
that's what always kills things, and that's why i have a doomed love life...
i do try to gather some confidence though, but since i don't have much to begin with, it takes a while and only in a certain kind of situation to gather it up and once i do it's way too late.
i always feel so inferior to guys i like because they always seems so awesome to me (though i usually don't get any opportunities to see if that's really true, but it's always my first impression) and i feel like such a nobody, no matter how much it seems like i have a chance to win over his attention.
sometimes i think it's just the mohawks that make me attracted to people, but most of the time the people themselves are that much more beautiful for having the nerve to get a mohawk and being able to pull it off. mohawks are kind of like starting points, if i got to know them and they wound up getting it chopped off, i'd still like them. i'm sure i'm not so shallow that i'd automatically stop liking them otherwise. the person makes the mohawk, in my opinion...
my friend says my problem is that i'm like a dog chasing after a car. once i get the car stopped i don't know what to do with it.
i think it's mostly true.
This is a really inactive community, isn't it?
Ah, well, thought I'd post here anyway, and at least no one has to listen to my silly whining ^___^;
The very beginning of the doomed-ness that is my love life, began when I was eight or so years old. (I started young... Stop laughing.) There was this guy, about nine, who was the oldest adopted son of a family who was friends with my family.
... God, I think I just confused MYSELF.
Anyway, so the guy and I... didn't get along. At all. At ALL. We glared at each other from across the room. He pushed me. I threw books at him. Ehehe... I was a rather violent eight year old.
So, this one time, we were calling each other a few of our usual childish insults, when this really, really, random thing happened. He sort of... leaned over and kissed me.
I completely FREAKED. I've always been ridiculously overdramatic and everything, but I might have surpassed my usual standards. ^_____^; Heh...
So I sicced the dog on him.
It wasn't what you'd think! Honest! The dog didn't just get up and attack him, my dog's nice! He's a sweetie! He... growled a bit. A lot. And then this guy yelped and sprinted up the stairs.
I've had many occasions since then with, okay, I'll say his name. Chris. Ugh, I said it. We've met up numerous times, including once this past New Year's. I insulted his intelligence, and it should have been so, so fun. But it wasn't.
Ahhhhhhhhhhh! It isn't fair! I think I may be completely and utterly OBSESSED with the guy! ... It SO isn't fair. It isn't. It isn't. It isn't. He's a jerk! But... I like him anyway. T__T WHY? WHY?!
And there you are, the story of my doomed love life.
Okay, my whining and angsting is finished. Heh, just an update to keep the community alive, not to mention get this stuff out of my conscience. I feel loads better now.
You know, as much as this community is really inactive, I WANT A FREAKING ICON FOR IT!!!
I would adore making one for it, but my paint shop pro is keeping secrets from me and I can't customize the fonts. >.< FRUSTRATION!!!
But but BUT!! If someone managed to make a TOTALLY RANDOM ICON, hearts out to you!!!
soo... do your best, and kick as much ass as you can!
Hey..you guys are all dead, eh?
Ah...life has been good so far....
i've been hearing a lot of DJ's on the radio talk about people and Christmas, just them either trying to persuade people not to do anything stupid over hoidays, or just making fun of them.
One radio host was talking aobut how some people get the nerve to propose to people on christmas, since it's such an auspicious day. of course, half of them have their's hearts wrenched out and stomped on as a result. i sort of thought that the people are really irrational when it gets to some commitment thing around the holidays. If it's just the date that they thinks it important, then why have to do it around that holiday? why not just create your own holiday by doing it another day?? >.< media also encourages this.... with all the jewelry swapping with the 'every kiss begins with k'
And the other was a warning to people about stupid things... suicide around a holiday.... methinks that some people's reason to do such rash things are because they are alone and on their own, without a loved one. this one frustrates me... just a little bit. christmas is fabled to be a holiday in which people connect with one another, supposied bonding time. Christmas, like any other american holiday, is ove done by the media. The real reason for is lost, within our materialistic needs.
The only thing that i can think of that we celebrate christmas is tradition. And *gasp* we can't break tradition. It's not right! so, we celebrate.
So! people!!! celebrate it!! That's FINE!!! but don't do STUPID THINGS JUST BECAUSE IT'S A HOLIDAY!!! NO GOOD FREAKING REASON.
i'm lost in what i was trying to get across...
x akumu x (11:42:38 AM): wanna give me some advice nee-san?
Arcanica (11:46:38 AM): sure
x akumu x (11:46:53 AM): say your best friend <----viet
Arcanica (11:47:00 AM): yeah
x akumu x (11:47:07 AM): gets a gf and kinda ignores you
x akumu x (11:47:19 AM): the thing is that you had this big crush on him for like 2 years
x akumu x (11:47:29 AM): (And yeah he knows, you already told him)
x akumu x (11:47:33 AM): anyways
x akumu x (11:47:50 AM): when you first find out about his little gf<---julia yamamoto
x akumu x (11:48:00 AM): you get kinda really jealous
x akumu x (11:48:10 AM): it's a normal reaction of course, you are only human
x akumu x (11:48:14 AM): so you do a stupid thing
x akumu x (11:48:58 AM): you go to a jerk named ronald <---he liked julia before and he doesn't seem to like viet, naturally you go to him in hope of breaking them up
x akumu x (11:49:14 AM): he doesn't seem very interested in the whole thing
x akumu x (11:49:35 AM): he just likes watching you being jealous and suffering
Arcanica (11:49:39 AM): o_O
x akumu x (11:49:49 AM): anyways
x akumu x (11:50:18 AM): your feelings for viet are like a rollarcoaster
x akumu x (11:50:21 AM): up and down they go
x akumu x (11:50:23 AM): <><
x akumu x (11:50:28 AM): anyways,
x akumu x (11:50:47 AM): one day you're bored and you aim ronald in hopes of company and amusement
x akumu x (11:51:22 AM): your friend at school<-----asami, who happens to have known julia for quite a while through japanese school
x akumu x (11:51:44 AM): has already you a lovely story about ronald that you just had to hear from himself for yourself
x akumu x (11:51:59 AM): so you talk to him, butter him up and get ready for the story
x akumu x (11:52:36 AM): (he and julia went out, she cheated on him by going out with viet, not the first time, other's have been hurt too... what-not)
x akumu x (11:52:57 AM): he finally tells you and then you discovered that he and julia have a little "war" going on
x akumu x (11:53:03 AM): they are both out to get each other
x akumu x (11:53:24 AM): after being nice to him (for the story) he adds you to his list of ppl on his side in the war
x akumu x (11:53:42 AM): he says that he "needs" you and that you are an important part of his force
x akumu x (11:53:57 AM): this is because you are viet's best friend and he trusts you
Arcanica (11:54:02 AM): o-O
Arcanica (11:54:05 AM): oh shit
x akumu x (11:54:08 AM): <><
x akumu x (11:54:10 AM): yeah i knnow
x akumu x (11:54:29 AM): his story was so sad and sappy you kind of feel sorry for him
x akumu x (11:54:33 AM): <><
x akumu x (11:54:54 AM): and even though there is a chance that he is lying, you go along with it to make him happy
x akumu x (11:55:16 AM): (besides all of his force has code name, his is vile and mine was jasmine)
x akumu x (11:55:24 AM): (from the movie secondhand lions)
Arcanica (11:55:31 AM): hahaha
Arcanica (11:55:37 AM): vile, switched arond, spells evil
x akumu x (11:55:42 AM): <><
x akumu x (11:55:44 AM): yeah
x akumu x (11:56:14 AM): julia has a little force her own including viet (your best friend/crush) and another one of your close friends (Asami)
x akumu x (11:56:24 AM): so you're split in half
x akumu x (11:56:34 AM): first you're partly on ronald's side
x akumu x (11:56:46 AM): and then you're working as a double agent
Arcanica (11:56:51 AM): o-O
x akumu x (11:57:12 AM): (only viet doesn't know this, so he still feels bitter towards you and doesn't really trust you)
Arcanica (11:57:18 AM): "Oh what a tangled web we weave when we first practice to deceive"
x akumu x (11:57:26 AM): then you just get sick of it all
x akumu x (11:57:29 AM): and stop
x akumu x (11:58:05 AM): anyways i build up all this trust and a special bond between me and my vietie
x akumu x (11:58:10 AM): but...............
x akumu x (11:58:25 AM): i screw it all up for a bit of fun and a few laughs
x akumu x (11:58:42 AM): viet doesn't talk to me a lot anymore
x akumu x (11:58:48 AM): and he seem very close to me
x akumu x (11:59:22 AM): i know he's busy with school, college (he's a senior and he totally screwed up in his junior year because of depression and his parents) and well yeah his gf
x akumu x (11:59:58 AM): but you kinda feel like "okay viet! look at me! pay attention i'm still here you know! you're still one of my best friends!"
x akumu x (12:00:05 PM): <><
x akumu x (12:00:17 PM): you kinda feel like you lost everything
Arcanica (12:00:53 PM): ouch
x akumu x (12:01:26 PM): because most of your friends went to Oak Grove, the ppl you hang out at school... you don't really hate or like... you can't ditch them to hang out with other friends, because your "best friend" alysssa hangs out with them and she always defends you and stuff....
x akumu x (12:02:17 PM): all your close friends you only talk through with aim, and your parents don't let you use aim so you can't even really talk when you want and you constantly have to watch out for getting caught
x akumu x (12:02:38 PM): you just feel sorta alone and bored with life itself
x akumu x (12:03:03 PM): and then you remember about all the good times you had with viet, esp. the tet trung thu festival at st. patrick
x akumu x (12:03:29 PM): and you feel like you're falling into this endless abyss and no one's there to caught you
Arcanica (12:03:34 PM): you mus tmiss him
x akumu x (12:03:45 PM): even when viet promised that he'd catched you if you ever fell
x akumu x (12:04:10 PM): heh
x akumu x (12:04:24 PM): he used to like another girl, melissa ly
x akumu x (12:04:31 PM): she got a bf sometime over the summer
x akumu x (12:04:40 PM): he finally stopped liking her around august or so
x akumu x (12:04:51 PM): and you remember how happy you were when you found out
x akumu x (12:05:29 PM): and during that time between when he stopped liking melissa and when he started going out with julia......
x akumu x (12:06:04 PM): you felt so happy and free, and you loved him so much and you realized that you rather have him as a best friend forever
x akumu x (12:06:24 PM): it's not that i'm jealous of julia and viet......
x akumu x (12:06:28 PM): i was...
x akumu x (12:06:38 PM): but now, i just want my best friend back
Arcanica (12:07:55 PM): hmm, do you t hink he feels angry at you ?
x akumu x (12:08:05 PM): a bit maybe
x akumu x (12:09:19 PM): anyways i have leave soon to go to lasan
Arcanica (12:09:28 PM): I see nothing wrong with coming up to him, telling him you feel bad (re:sorry) for being jealous of his gf, taking sides, creating drama etc. and that you really value him greatly and and miss his friendship
Arcanica (12:09:44 PM): that he means a lot to you and stuff.
x akumu x (12:09:52 PM): heh
x akumu x (12:09:55 PM): <><
x akumu x (12:09:56 PM): yeah
Arcanica (12:09:56 PM): how he takes it from there is his part, but I think that's the best you can do
x akumu x (12:10:18 PM): thanks sis!
Arcanica (12:10:33 PM): no prob, have fun at lasan yo
x akumu x (12:10:36 PM): "i don't think that life's that simple" - utada hikaru
x akumu x (12:10:38 PM): hai!
Arcanica (12:10:40 PM): yesh
x akumu x (12:10:42 PM): i mean oui
x akumu x (12:10:43 PM): ....
x akumu x (12:10:44 PM): <><
Arcanica (12:10:47 PM): haha but an apology works
x akumu x (12:10:50 PM): i do that in my french class
Arcanica (12:10:52 PM): I love that song
Arcanica (12:10:53 PM): hahahahah
seee? ME fine Nati.
ah...well, this community is umm... interestingly dead...
the originator has not been posting... rather horrible ordeal around there...
anyways, what might happen is just us typing about weird things that we might do with our love lives...
I am supposidly going to be a scandelous nun *i'll explain later*, Nagrom is *hopefully* in the process of creating a list of stuff she has married her body parts to, whether or not she has cancel them or not. nicoli is doing something.
ANYWAYS!!! just find some to post, just freaking do it. our love lives are doomed, thus creating a reason for us to be even posting on this.
i really don't see if we have to REALLY have a purpose for even posting... you should just be DOING this.
people, you are encouraged to post!!! you are members for a reason!!!
do i have to find things for you people to post about?!?! argh...
whatever, just do it!! now.
i joined this thing a long time ago...like in 7th grade or something?
but yes, i see that we're all dead here...:)
REMEMBER this is not a prediction, but a fun thing in which you make up your death! have fun!
Things that may happen that may induce your speacial ending:
~Involved in Mafia
List of how some people are going to die. you cannot claim one of these and you have to make up your own unless you choose to ask.
~die in sleep
~die from crossfire as a reasult of mafia
~die from falling from your bed reasulting in a cuncussion
~die by suicide from falling of bridges,boats,buildings,*lots o' bs*, cliffs.
~die by beating from old lady
~die from spontaneous combustion
~die reasulting from plane crash to roanoak island
~die hijacking a plane but did not exit the plane when it was going over a cliff
~die by poison
Things you may claim...
i have no idea but i'm just posting this because i started this a heck of a long time ago... so i bid you adieu